Our family went through years of crises when our daughters were in elementary school. I shared some of our story in previous blog posts. I remember Christmas 2005. My husband was recovering from major surgery. We were on the verge of losing everything we worked for. There was little money for presents. I was sad and my heart hurt. I could not imagine our daughters waking up to nothing under the Christmas tree.
In addition to the financial struggle, my energy was depleted from emotionally supporting our daughters and my husband during his recovery. I was exhausted from years of trying to keep our household afloat. It felt like I was being buried alive by the pressures of our situation. Family blessed us. They knew our situation and wanted to help us. That holiday, the girls got bikes for Christmas, a few items of clothing and a couple of board games.
Angst
The angst I felt during that Christmas season caused me to change my viewpoint. I was concerned that other professionals would judge us because we could not give our daughters amazing gifts. The truth is I wanted to show others that we were well off, too. My concerns did not match my true feelings. The truth is I wanted our daughters to feel safe, secure, and stable. I wanted their dad and I to communicate that above all we loved and valued them.
My husband and I decided that from that Christmas going forward, we would focus our time, attention, and energy on our family. I personally decided to be the best mommy I could be. Our family mission statement and my personal mission statement were born. This change informed our decisions going forward. Christmas was just the beginning.
I realized that my life meant nothing without my husband and children. My family was the source of my values. These values formed the basis of my mission statement.
Now that our daughters are college students and making their way into adulthood, my mission statement has changed slightly. I still enjoy being the best mommy I can be. We also continue to focus on our family. As I moved into a new stage of life, I realized that my mission should grow as I have grown.
A New Mission Statement
Consequently, I adopted a new mission. “I will live life with gusto.” All my thoughts, feelings, behaviors, and actions will filter through this mission statement. It is based in the value I have for quality of life. When I was younger, I lived as if tomorrow is guaranteed. Now that I am older, I understand that every moment is precious and should be enjoyed.
A meaningful mission statement begins with those things that you hold dear. This goes beyond important. It addresses those true deep, long standing beliefs that direct your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. We must remember that some deep, long standing beliefs are not true. We hold on to them because we have been conditioned to believe them. Therefore, we must search our hearts to determine if the belief is a true representation of our individual essence.
What You Value
What you value most gives meaning to your mission statement. Begin to develop your mission statement by becoming aware of your source or sources of value. These are the areas of your life that bring to life those things you value. For example, my family provides joy, satisfaction, and peace. I value and desire these feelings. Therefore, one of my sources of value is my family. Think about the various domains in which you function. What value do you gain from those domains? Feel free to share in the comment section.
My method is not for the woman who wants a quick fix. Your life is complex and so is the stress you experience. I am working with women who desire to live quality lives and are willing to commit to a process to get there.
I offer several options to help you on this journey.
Get to Know Me:
Stress Talk “Live” with Marcyline Bailey
Stress Talk Facebook group
Stress Talk with Marcyline Bailey Podcast
Self-Help:
Take the “Ish” Out of Selfish and Put Self First
“Here is to your sustainable, successful and satisfying stress managed life.”
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