Have you ever started watching a movie from the middle? The movie is on and you see a scene that captures your interest, so you watch it until the end. I am notorious for doing that. The problem is that the first 10 – 15 minutes of the movie always provides key information that will set the tone for the rest of the movie.
For example, I finally saw the very beginning of a Christmas movie starring Danny Glover. After five minutes, I heard myself saying, “oh wow, I understand what’s going on now.” I had seen this movie many times, but never saw it from the very beginning. The five minutes at the beginning explained so much about how the movie played out.
Temporary or Long Lasting
When it comes to stress management, working women approach it like we missed the first 15 minutes of a movie. We attempt interventions, like periodic exercise, mani/pedi appointments, mental health days off, that may provide temporary, if any, relief. This is because we are missing key information. Our actions put bandages on the problem without addressing the root of the problem.
Effective stress management begins when we take a comprehensive look at ourselves. I believe that stress management should be sustainable. You should have the capacity to maintain the activities or actions you enact to manage stress without interruption.
Physical Response
Stress is a physical response. Our bodies are designed to keep us safe. Our brain uses the information we gather through our five senses and does constant “risk” assessments. It also assesses risks based on our thoughts, core beliefs and feelings. So, when the brain senses that we are at risk, it initiates the stress response.
The stress response is a physical reaction that starts instantly. We often ignore or do not notice the physical sensations unless they are extreme. For example, hearts beat faster and harder. When extreme, it feels as if your heart is racing and beating out of your chest. Pupils dilate allowing more light into our eyes. Breathing becomes shallow. An extreme response may seem as if you cannot breathe. Skeletal muscles strengthen and the body has increased energy.
The stress response provides the body with superhuman strength. This is how women lift cars off children after an accident. It is also how petite women carry 200 pound men to safety. Major emergencies require superhuman abilities to maintain safety for ourselves and those around us. Stress related problems occur when our brain repeatedly initiates the stress response before we return to a more relaxed state.
A Trickle or an Overflow
I love to use visuals and metaphors to illustrate a point. Think of a water barrel. Water barrels are open at the top and have spigots near the bottom. Most gardeners attach a hose to the spigot for convenience when they water their plants. Rainwater flows into the barrel from the open top. If the spigot is turned to the off position, the barrel will fill. When it is full, it will overflow from the open top.
Gardeners use the water before the barrel overflows by turning on the spigot and spraying their plants. The barrel may never completely fill because water is regularly expended. It also does not completely empty unless there is a drought or the gardener uses more water than intended. For the most part, the water level remains constant unless it is raining or the gardener is water plants.
Now, here is the thing, the water barrel will fill and possibly overflow if the gardener uses less water than the water barrel collects each time it rains. Unless our bodies return to a natural level before another stress event, the stress compounds and eventually creates physical, mental, and emotional concerns.
My process of stress management provides sustainable, satisfying relief so that you feel successful in all areas of life. This is not a one size fits all, temporary solution you find on the internet. My process uses what you know about yourself to create a personalized response to individual stress events.
I Teach You to:
- Know your starting point aka your stress baseline.
- Understand what stress is and how it works.
- Recognize the true causes of your stress and the varying levels of stress you experience.
- Create personalized prevention and intervention strategies that fit you and your lifestyle.
My method is not for the woman who wants a quick fix. Your life is complex and so is the stress you experience. I am working with women who desire to live quality lives and are willing to commit to a process to get there.
I offer several options to help you on this journey.
Get to Know Me:
Stress Talk “Live” with Marcyline Bailey
Stress Talk Members Only Facebook group
Stress Talk with Marcyline Bailey Podcast
Self-Help:
Take the “Ish” Out of Selfish and Put Self First
“Here is to your sustainable, successful and satisfying stress managed life.”
Visit the M.L. Bailey Consultants website</strong> to view our calendar of events. Join the conversation by liking our Facebook page, following me on Instagram and connecting with me on LinkedIn.